This year’s Oracleites traveled bravely up The Rail of Seniors, past the burning trashcan in the bathroom and received the 10 Commandments of Asking for Food from the man upstairs, Principal Mike Mukai himself.

I. Thou shalt offer thy neighbor if he offers you.
This is common sense. If your friend is compassionate enough to offer you a bite of his pizza, toss him a couple fruit snacks. I’m sure he would do the same for you (hopefully when he has something good like Chic-Fil-A).
II. Thou shalt always ask.
When it comes to food, it is NOT easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission. Taking food off of someone’s plate without asking is right up there with the seven deadly sins, so don’t do it. The following two commandments dictate how you should ask.
III. Thou shalt ask politely.
If you can’t look your potential charity-giver in the eyes, don’t even ask. Use the magic word: please. Or is it thank-you? Either way, you should use both. Also, use common sense. You should not ask someone if he’s going to eat something if he is literally in the process of eating it, nor should you ask and then take without waiting for a response. Here’s a tip: if you ask a person for a bite of whatever he likes the least on his plate, he will be more likely to bless you with his generosity.
IV. Thou shalt ask discreetly.
If your friend spares you a piece of food, make sure you don’t flaunt it around so that the whole lunch table implores your friend for a bite. Just like committing a crime, get in and get out.
V. A bite shall be a bite.
A bite should be reasonably sized. It should have a diameter no greater than that of a chicken nugget.
VI. Thou shalt not take a person’s favorite food.
They are not going to give it to you anyway, so just let them enjoy it. If your friend loves Hot Cheetos with all of her heart, do not ask for some and disturb her cheesy, spicy paradise.
VII. In the case of best friends, thou shalt take the food.
This is the only exception to Commandment II, and it pretty much transcends all other commandments. Any food is fair game if it belongs to your best friend. No need to ask; just take and relish in your BFF’s anger.
VIII. Thou shalt not take food from a frenemy.
This is basically the inverse of commandment VII. If one of your friends secretly hates everything about you, taking their food will just exacerbate his or her bitterness and might lead to some serious angry sub-tweeting.
IX. In the case of delicacies, thou shalt only take when offered.
This applies to anything out of the ordinary. If somebody has Chipotle at your lunch table, don’t pester him for a bite of the rare treat.
X. Thou shalt not be that guy.
This one is for all the nefarious food thieves lurking the halls of WS. We all know that one guy who either asks for food or steals food every single day. It gets old real fast. Once again, don’t be that guy.

So endeth the commandments.